Creating Cohesiveness

As the end of the school year is approaching, I am beginning to look at ideas for this summer. I have already planned several things, but there are 10 weeks to fill! I really want to take this time to establish cohesiveness in my family unit. In the craziness of our routine; work, school, extracurricular activities, we have lost the simplicity of just spending time with one another. Quality time. I want to be intentional about regaining this precious gift of time with my husband and daughters. I want to enjoy my family this summer. I don't want to over-schedule our time off, but I do want to create the opportunities to spend quality time together. My hope is that we can find local activities that will pique all of our interests. My mind is swirling with ideas and I can't wait to start brainstorming with Brandon and the girls!

A bit of a better day

Today was better. Easier. I am sure a lot of this has to do with the fact that the girls had school today. I still missed the mark though. I lost patience. I yelled. I recoiled and reminded myself to value the character of the girls more than the misbehavior. It is so hard to change bad habits. I never thought that I would sit here today and reflect on the fact that I yell at my kids. I vowed growing up that I was going to be different. I would be calm. And yet, here I am. Struggling.

It is amazing how much perspective brings to the table. I appreciate my childhood so much more now that I am a mom. I can understand why things happened; why responses seemed harsh. I am living and breathing the challenge of parenting and I am making many of the same mistakes. One thing is for sure, God has softened my heart and brought me compassion I never dreamed I would have.

Tomorrow is a new day. I am so thankful for fresh beginnings. Maybe, just maybe, I can find a little bit more of the patience and calmness I desire...

Not fun being a mommy!

Being a mom sucks sometimes. I never know if I am totally screwing up the girls or if they will turn out okay. I hate discipline and second guessing myself. Am I being to harsh? Should I have handled that differently? Do they need less consequences and more love? UGH! I don't know what to do about Claire's back talk and sassy-ness. She is constantly trying to steer the conversation, get the final word in, and cause me to second guess myself. On more than one occasion she has expressed that she feels like I love Hannah more than I love her. I really believe that she believes this and that she isn't just trying to get a reaction out of me. I don't know how to change her view on this, other than to just love on her. However she is definitely the more hard headed out of the two, and she needs more discipline than Hannah. Hannah cracks easier and seems to learn her lessons after a time out. Claire on the other hand just loves to continue to push the envelope and that brings about more discipline. Why couldn't kiddos come with instructions? I really hope that I can show Claire just how much I love her and that she doesn't grow up needing years of therapy!