Today was better. Easier. I am sure a lot of this has to do with the fact that the girls had school today. I still missed the mark though. I lost patience. I yelled. I recoiled and reminded myself to value the character of the girls more than the misbehavior. It is so hard to change bad habits. I never thought that I would sit here today and reflect on the fact that I yell at my kids. I vowed growing up that I was going to be different. I would be calm. And yet, here I am. Struggling.
It is amazing how much perspective brings to the table. I appreciate my childhood so much more now that I am a mom. I can understand why things happened; why responses seemed harsh. I am living and breathing the challenge of parenting and I am making many of the same mistakes. One thing is for sure, God has softened my heart and brought me compassion I never dreamed I would have.
Tomorrow is a new day. I am so thankful for fresh beginnings. Maybe, just maybe, I can find a little bit more of the patience and calmness I desire...
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