Catching Up

Wow! October already! I can't believe it is Fall! I love this time of year; it is so busy but also so good! We have a full schedule and life is filled with ups and downs.

Time for updates!

Hannah banana broke her right arm on September 21st. It was so scary for both Brandon and I. We both lost it! She was getting ready to go down the slide and somehow slipped. She rolled down on her arm and it was visibly broken. It makes my stomach hurt just thinking about it! She was a trooper through the whole event and is now the proud owner of a bright pink cast. It has been challenging with this change though; she can't do gymnastics right now, bathing is a pain, and she has to have help dressing. Oh well, it is short lived. The cast comes off on November 4th.

Being that her right arm is broken, school has been a bit of a challenge too. She is right handed. I am blown away by her perseverance- Hannah has learned to write and color with her LEFT hand! It is sometimes a bit sloppy (or sloppier than her regular writing-Ha!) but it is usually quite impressive! She is doing great in school and adjusting well!

On to my Claire bear! Claire is fantastic! She is doing great academically! I can't believe how smart she is! She loves to learn and is constantly asking questions (which can drive me batty at times). She is continuing Ballet and is doing well. She is so athletic and constantly on the move. At home, she is teaching herself how to do cartwheels and handstands. I hope this doesn't lead to injury! LOL! She is attending a God and Me class to earn a patch for Girl Scouts. This year she is a 2nd year Daisy (it is a 2 year program) in Girl Scouts. She is just so adorable! I am so proud of my girl and how well she is doing in life!

Brandon is busy with work. He recently moved departments and is now the supervisor in the Deli. This change has been filled with it's challenges. His schedule has changed completely, and the responsibilities are so different from his previous position. The change has been good though, and we are hoping that it will prepare him for a promotion in the future.

I am good. Busy as always. I love to volunteer- at church, the girl's school- and it keeps me quite busy. I am also working part time at church and this has been fun and a huge blessing financially! I am so grateful for where I am at right now.

Well that's it for now. I will have to post a funny story about the girl's later! :-)

School Days

Last week the girls began school. I now am a mom of a Kindergartner and a 1st grader. I can't believe it! The week started off great- lots of excitement from both girls. They were too cute on the first day of school. We took LOTS of pictures and both girls left us smiling and happy. Tuesday and Wednesday held the same eagerness and I was thinking that this was an easy transition. Then came pick up on Wednesday afternoon. They had hit a wall. More accurately Hannah had hit a wall! She was exhausted and grumpy! She begged me to let her stay home on Thursday so that she could have a "day off". I reminded her that her days off were now Saturday and Sunday. Tear flowed. Daddy dropped her off that morning and it was a sad goodbye. School had lost it's charm. Friday brought the same. Now it is Sunday night and tomorrow begins a new week of school. I wonder what kind of week it will be?

Jesus broke bread

Today I told the girls that we would be spending the day cleaning and organizing. They weren't too thrilled with the idea, but obliged and began to clean up the play room. As they were working, I told them that they could make a pile of toys to give away if they wanted to. They liked that idea and I reminded them that it was a kind and caring thing to do. They began to go through the play kitchen food, discussing each item to decide if they should keep it or give it away. A few minutes later, Hannah comes to me with a loaf of plastic bread. She announced, "We are going to keep this bread. I already gave away the cross cookie cutter so other kids will have something about Jesus. Jesus broke bread and this will remind me about Him." Priceless. I loved that moment. It made me realize that they are "getting" the life of Jesus. They are remembering it and processing through what it means. They are understanding that their generosity and loving actions can teach others about the character of Christ. I was humbled and reminded myself that I am the hands and feet of Jesus too.

9 weeks

Tomorrow is the last day of kindergarten for Claire. I can hardly believe how fast this school year has flown by! She is going to be a first grader. That seems so big. And to top it off, Hannah is going to be a kindergartner. Both girls in elementary school. WOW! I am racking my brain trying to figure out how they have grown so quickly. I feel like time is racing by and I need to slow down and savor my kiddos because they are quickly moving into new phases and stages. I remember growing up it seemed as is time stood still. Summer vacations seemed SO long. Christmas took forever to come around. Each birthday felt a million years away. As an adult, this is simply not the case. Time has not only sped up, it seems to be going 3x's as fast as it should. I feel like I barely have time to recover let alone keep up.

Summer break is 9 weeks. Claire is anxious about what those 9 weeks are going to entail; what routine will be kept. I keep reassuring her that we have plenty to do in these 9 short weeks, but she insists that it is a LONG time and we will run out of things to fill our time. It will be interesting to see my perspective at the end of the summer; if the 9 weeks seemed to whiz by or if time slowed down a bit. I am betting on the first; while 9 weeks is a good chunk of time, we have alot planned for our summer. I am buckling in because I am prepared for a busy and crazy ride!

The whirlwind

One week ago today, I graduated from college. WOW! I am still a bit shocked that this goal is finally completed. I did it! It took longer than I thought; but still, it is done. It was a great day; spent with my close friends and family. I even found myself tearing up when I entered the ceremony and spotted my kids. It was an emotional and fulfilling day.

And then Sunday came. And I felt sick. Like I have never before. I couldn't breathe. I could hardly move. By Sunday evening, I felt like I was being suffocated. I was scared and tired. I went to the doctor first thing Monday morning. It wasn't long before she was telling me to get to the ER. So off we went. To the ER. I never thought I would be admitted to the hospital, but I was. My asthma took a quick turn for the worse and it wasn't changing. I spent 2 nights in the hospital. I was bored out of my mind. I was forced to sit there and do nothing but rest. Funny, God has been nudging me to rest more. I guess I better listen more!

So within a week I went from a major life accomplishment to forced rest. And I am still resting so that I can fully recover. It is interesting how life happens sometimes.

Be anxious for nothing....

I am anxious. I have a lot swirling around in my mind and I am anxious. My graduation is coming up this weekend; anxiety. We are tight financially; anxiety. I am looking for a part time job; anxiety. I believe that everything will work out, but I can't shake this feeling. I keep praying to God for relief and I know He is there listening and acting. I want to be free of anxiety, but I know that it keeps me close to God.

I have so much to be thankful for. I am trying to keep my focus on my numerous blessings. God has given me so much; health, a home, an abundance of things, a family, cars, a stable job for my husband etc. I could go on and on. I need to dwell on these good things.

In 18 days...

I will be a college graduate. I am cautiously excited. I keep waiting for the rug to be ripped out from under me; for someone to say, "Just kidding! You don't get to walk". I don't know why I expect this; I have worked hard and I know that I am done. Well, sort of. I still have 3.5 free elective units to complete over the summer, but all the core work is done. And yet, I am still afraid. I have been in college off and on for the past 11 years. I always knew I would get a degree. I expected to be done before this point in my life, but I have 2 beautiful distractions that detoured my plans. And I am okay with that.

After graduation, I am going to take the summer to enjoy the girls. We have a busy summer planned; camping, visiting old friends, cousins coming to stay with us, ballet recital, Hannah's preschool graduation and Blitz camp at church. I am excited for less stress (ie. Homework) but a bit anxious about not having a structured routine. But my goal is to go with the flow; to enjoy the lazy days of summer.

And in the Fall, I must get a job. My husband works so hard to provide for us. I want to be able to contribute to our family financially so that we have a bit more freedom in our spending. Nothing too crazy; I am hoping to work only part time. I know jobs are hard to come by, so I am planning on beginning the search in July. I am already praying for a perfect job; I believe that there is something out there that will fit beautifully into my schedule.

And the following Fall, I am going to grad school. I love to learn and wish that I could emotionally handle jumping into a grad program right now; but I am burnt out. I know my limit and I have beyond reached it. I know that a grad program is going to be taxing; I need to be emotionally recharged before I walk into an intensive 2-3 year program. And, I need to invest into my family. They have sacrificed countless hours while I worked on homework or pushed to finish a final. They need me. They deserve my attention for a while.

Silly Girls

I am sitting here listening to my sweet girls laugh and play. It is such a sweet sound. I am so blessed to be able to watch my kiddos grow up; to share their joys, frustrations, and milestones with them. I all too often take this for granted. But really, I am one lucky mama!

I am down to the final few weeks of school. It is both exciting and scary. I am taking a year off; I need it and my family needs it! I hope to use this next year to grow closer to God, my husband, and my girls. I also hope to get to know me better. Lately (like most of my life) I have been so busy that I have forgotten to check in with me. I am determined to change this; to take time and rest and get to know who I really am. It is long overdue!

This next week is Spring Break for the girls. I am excited to spend some time out of routine. I am determined to be less rigid and enjoy our week off together! We are hoping to visit San Fransisco and have some play dates. Later in the week, Grandma and Auntie are coming to visit. It will be nice not to have appointments, school, and busyness predict our days!

Rainy Day and Parenting Woes

I am sitting and snuggling with the girls and it is raining outside. I love the sound of rain. It has been a challenging afternoon with the girls- lots of bickering and petty arguments. I have done good keeping my cool but I am definitely ready for their bedtime!

I have a speech to give tomorrow night for my Communications class. I am speaking on the topic of parenting. It is funny, I have SO many parenting books! I keep adding to my collection; I guess I am looking for the secret answer to being a good parent! I don't think there is one! However, as I have been preparing for this speech, I have been reading the book, Scream Free Parenting. I LOVE this book! It is so practical and easy to understand. I am going to re-read it this summer (since I will be FREE of homework by then) and try to really glean some useful tools for my parenting tool bag.

One of the little quotes in the book really stood out to me. It says, " Without space to make their own mistakes, our kids live only borrowed lives." Wow! I want so badly to protect my girls from mistakes. But really, they have to experience them to grow. It is so hard to let go and trust God and believe that they will be okay.

The end is near

I can hardly believe it, but the end of my schooling is near. Well, at least the bachelor's part. I still want to get my masters. But I digress. The end of this 18 month long journey is almost over. I am in a bit of shock. I keep wondering if I will really graduate in May. In my head, some unforeseen circumstance is going to prevent me from getting my diploma. That would really suck. And after I do graduate in May, then what? I know that I want to pursue my Masters in Social work, but the only school that offers that program is Sac State and it is very competitive to get into. What if I don't get accepted? I am planning on taking some time off this next year, but what if in the fall of 2011 I don't get in? My mind hasn't been my friend lately- I have been filled with doubts. I know that I need to let go and let God. I am trying. I am trusting that His plan will work. Mine might not, but His will.

A New Year

Wow it has been awhile since I have had time to write! What a rollercoaster the past few months have been; so very busy...

Lets see, some updates....

Claire- my sweet girl is now 6 years old. I can hardly believe it! She is getting too big, too fast. I am a little sad this year as I realize just how fast the past 6 years have gone by and how much of it I "missed". I want to be able to savor my girls more and enjoy them to the fullest! For her birthday, we went to the Railroad Museum in Sacramento. It was so much fun. Both girls had a blast and wanted to walk through the whole museum a second time. After that, we (being Aunt Jeanne, Grandma Debbie, Aunt Barbara, Hannah, Claire, and I) went lunch at the Cheesecake Factory. Good food!

Claire is just so full of life. She is very curious and can spend the day asking question after question. While this is quite tiring, I try to remind myself that she is just like a sponge and she wants more and more knowledge!

Hannah- this cutie pie is keeping me on my toes! She is learning that whining and crying will earn her a time out! Hannah is insistent on wearing a dress or a skirt over pants EVERYDAY! We spend alot of time in "negotiations" regarding her outfits. She is very determined to remain a princess. She has specific ideas about accessories and hairdos as well. Hannah is finally enjoying preschool which makes it SO much easier to take her!

Hannah is so compassionate. On Christmas day as I was tucking her into bed, she began to cry because she didn't want Christmas to be over. It wasn't about the gifts; it was about the magic of the season.

The other day the girls were playing in the backyard and I heard the following conversation:

Hannah: Claire, do you have Jesus in your heart?
Claire: Of course I do, Hannah, do you?
Hannah: Yes, sissy. I love Jesus!

This was so sweet and sincere! It made me smile and think that I must be doing something right for them to have random conversations about Jesus!

Okay, back to updates....

Brandon- He is doing good. He is working hard and playing harder. Now that ski season is here, he is quite happy and spends his Wednesdays enjoying the snow! I worry about him every time he goes, but I know that he will be okay. He has been busy at work, which I am so grateful for. No worries of what is going to happen with his job; Costco isn't going anywhere!

Me- I finished a 21 unit semester on December 16th. It was so hard and I wanted to quit many times, but I persevered and got A's and B's in all my classes! In addition to school, I have stayed busy running MOPS and helping coordinate a Christmas event at church. I am looking forward to my last semester, which starts in a few days. I can't wait to be done with this program! I am planning on continuing on to get my masters, but not until I take a break!

We also visited Disneyland in October for a week. It was a great trip and we are already planning this next years trip!

For this new year, I have a few resolutions. Of course the first being loosing weight. I think this is common on most people's list, but I am committed to making changes. So far I am eating smaller meals throughout the day. This is a challenge because I am NOT a morning person and I don't usually eat breakfast. I am also beginning to use my treadmill again and hope to hop on the Wii and use the fit board or the active program.

My second resolution is to savor my time more. I feel that I am so busy all the time that I don't ever get to really enjoy things. I want to slow it down and not rush through life anymore- it goes fast enough on it's own!

That's it for now- time to get the kids in the bath and get dinner cooking!